Sunday, May 21, 2006 - :

he said it two days ago..
why he love me?
why he thought i made him feel special?
its strange..
but todae he was weird...
he hurt me a few times..he thought..
but i chose not to be affected by this..
there's alot of other things that's worth occupying my mind.
my schedule's tight...
time seems to pass very fast and its suffocating
time really has a bad habit of slipping away...

todae damn bz..
i'm tired
yet i still can't sleep
thinking..
thinking bout nothing..
maybe bout life...but what about it?
maybe bout todae...no i dun think so...
nothing, seems the best word to describe it..

there's a lot of thing, as i said, i learnt when i werk
and one of the thing i've learnt from thisdis damn f&b place is,
revenge is a dish best served cold...
i noe its sounds mean but that's what my werkplace had taught me..
to be mean

i miss real people
people who loves me,
people who cherished me
i miss my friends
poly..sec...
i miss my fam,
i miss my bf,
but it seems like they're missing in my new complicated life
maybe bcoz they're real
simple and not complicated
and dats why they're not in the picture

i was saddened by the fact that i cant decide and make choices
and dats why i'm stuck here
i wanted so much to tell edwin what i really felt bout him..
i wanted so much to talk to sufyian's wife
i wanted so much to tell my boss how uncomfortable i am with him around
i wanted so much to quit
i wanted so much to tell nathan dat i'm sorry.
i wanted so much to tell my boyfriend i love him very much and every day he is my strength ..and i love him more now
but then i can't
the reason, unknown.

I've got it all,
but I feel so deprived
I go up,
I come down
and I'm emptier inside
Tell me what is this thing
that I feel like I'm missing
And why can't I let it go
There's gotta be more to life
Than chasing down every temporary high to satisfy me
Cause the more that I'm...Trippin' out thinkin' there must be more to life
Well it's life, but I'm sure... There's gotta be more
I've got the time
and I'm wasting it slowly
Here in this moment I'm half-way out the door
Onto the next thing,
I'm searching for something that's missing

~ **** EnUF sAiD ****~ 3:41 AM